What is it about the beginning of a new year that gets you reflecting? You begin rewinding the year, picking apart the good, weeding through the bad, and coming to the realization that it was a good year – but next year will be better. For me personally, 2012 flew by. I can’t remember month to month, day to day, or even week by week. The bits and pieces of the year I do remember though, are golden.
2012 was a year of new beginnings for me. I began to get to know myself again- the new self I became with God now in charge. God and I began working together to make a better version of me. Once selfishness turned to selflessness I began to enjoy life more. Worry has changed forever. From being a person with mapped out priorities, lists, and expectations to “worry” about – I began to pray about things and leave it alone. The weightlessness that fills you when you recognize you aren’t in control anyway is awe inspiring. Why worry?! My favorite scripture of all time is Jeremiah 29:11 – For I know the plans I have for you, Declares The Lord plans to prosper you and not harm you. To give you hope and a future.
It’s funny when I read it before I always thought “prosper” meant money. Boy did I have things twisted. My prosperity this year has not been made of money (it was quite the opposite). My prosperity is far greater though!!!
I am happy – Truly happy. I am loved and in love. I am hopeful. I am excited. I am new. I am ready.
I am ready for this new year. I am ready to meet our precious baby in April. (The child that almost never was). I am ready to begin a life with my new husband. I am ready to struggle financially if we need to. I am ready to live by a new standard. I am ready to follow God completely, wholeheartedly, and without motive. I want whatever God wants.
So God, I’m ready.
Happy New Year
Life goes on… What happens after God puts a call on your life? Well, LIFE CHANGES. No time for twiddling my thumbs anymore…..
The axis shifted while I was away on the Florida coastline. I was busy soaking up the sun, doing some much needed fishing, and eating all the seafood one can handle – and I didn’t even realize that time was up. First of all, announcement #1 is that I am happily remarried. Thank God! This one is the final one. This one, it the right one. The love of my lifetime. We enjoyed a great wedding on the beach and a honeymoon beachfront condo packed with all the family (literally, every one of them). It was perfect. We had just gotten back to Texas, and we were so busy unpacking, moving, and catching up at work that we missed the fact that I had missed something. Several weeks have gone by now, and I decided I needed to check on it.
Ready for announcement #2?
When I found out, I almost fell out on the floor. I made the doctor test me 3 different ways “just to be sure”. And sure enough, it was true. I think I am still in shock. I wasn’t “ready” for that news. Then again, was I ready for any of the news I got last year? Nope. So here we go! I guess Trinity Grace is in the processing plant, and we have about 8 months to prepare. EEkkk!! My husband is bouncing off the walls, cleaning, storing, nesting – if you will. Me? Well, I am sleeping. Sleeping A LOT. This baby making thing takes a lot out of you. I’m recognizing the use of a good power nap, I’m peeing 50 times a day, and I wake up in the middle of the night parched, realizing this baby eats everything including the taste in my mouth. It’s definitely new for me.
I’ve been anointed for his purpose. So I guess I was equipped with the skills to see it through. I am holding tight to Jeremiah 29:11 ya’ll!
HERE WE GO!
At some point, you guys are going to start thinking I’m making these stories up. However I warn you before I go any further – these are real. Tonight another really amazing thing happened to me and I can’t wait to share it!
Yesterday I had an hour to kill in between appointments so I decided to take a stroll in a department store browsing. I had been looking for a wedding dress for months, and not just any dress would do. LET ME TAKE A MINUTE TO EXPLAIN WHY
Remember I mentioned the visions I had been seeing? One of which was my wedding. My soon-to-be had seen the exact same vision, however where I only saw him, he only saw me. He explained the dress he saw to a very specific detail, he drew that dress on a napkin for me a couple months ago, and I have been obsessed with finding it every since. I knew it existed somewhere because God showed it to him, and it was burned so vividly in his mind.
I snapped a picture of a dress I saw at this department store and picture messaged him on his cell phone. I continued looking, because I didn’t think it was quite the right dress. He got back to me 30 minutes later and said “thats it” in caps. After I got the text message my phone blew up with phone calls from him. Well… I had already left the store. Matter of fact, I was 10 mintutes away so I popped a U-turn in the street and went back to get that dress (which they only had one of by the way.)
I pulled in, ran into the store like a mad-woman and went to the spot I found it. GONE! I panicked. I walked every isle thinking someone put it down somewhere else (after all it had only been 30 mins!) I even went so far as to see if anyone else was holding my dress – and I had decided I was going to buy them out to have that dress! I peeled every dress one-by-one until I was sure that it was gone. I asked every person on the floor about that dress and insisted they check in the stockroom, because I wasn’t leaving without that dress! Unfortunately, the dress was, in fact, gone – with no others to replace it.
I WAS DISHEARTENED. I made the phone call, and told him..
That night he got home from work and insisted we go back to the store. I insisted that I didn’t want to go back because I knew it wasn’t there- nor was there anymore coming. He was adament. So I digressed and went along preparing for yet another disappointment.
We got to the parking lot, and he prayed. In his prayer he said “Let us find the right dress, the one you showed me, and put it in my hand Lord, Amen”. I looked over at him, and smirked. We walked in. We went to the dresses.
BAM! There was that dress. Not just one, but four of them in each size.
I had an Oh my God! moment just then. My eyes were the size of golf balls when I said “those dresses were NOT there, I checked!”
I grabbed the dresses, rushed to the fitting room, and tried it on. I found one that fit, walked out, and I knew. His face said it all. After 10 minutes he uttered “That’s it!”
So I believe that dress was meant to be. He saw it, God provided it. If I had found it earlier in the day, it wouldn’t have been this great testimony to what God can do with a little faith and prayer. I now own the wedding dress that my hubby saw in his vision months back. How amazing is that story?! It is almost too surreal to believe. However, if God is for us who can stand against us?
What difference did you make in someone’s life today?
So many Christians believe that they have to do something groundbreaking, enormous, and vastly substantial to make a difference. This couldn’t be further from the truth. God uses each of us together to make the big things happen. Have you ever watched a group tug of war competition? Picture watching the two teams battle, but only half of the first teams group is doing the work. Guess who won? It’s easy to see that every little bit that is done helps. Do not discount your “little bit”.
I remember when I was a child, I was working outside with my dad. We were digging a ditch to put in a swimming pool. Gosh, I remember that hole having to be extremely deep and wide, and no matter how much dirt I shoveled, it never seemed to get any deeper. When I was looking drained and exhausted from ditch digging, I remember dad looking at me and saying “every little bit you do, is a little less that I have to do”. I guess my “little bit” meant a little more to him than it did to me.
Another story I am reminded of as I write this. I was given 3 large print bibles by a friend of mine. (their “little bit”). I kept them in my car, just in case the opportunity to minister to someone might arise. One afternoon I was sitting at a Wendy’s eating lunch. I saw an elderly woman with a palm sized bible and what seemed like bottle cap glasses, trying to examine that book in front of her. At first, I laughed at its hilarity, but then I was immediately reprimanded and reminded that I had the solution to her problem not 5 feet away. I put down my hamburger, walked to my car, and pulled out a large print bible I had been saving. I walked in, handed it to her, and said” I think this is yours.” (“my little bit”) She was elated. She smiled, had me put my name and her name in that bible together, and said she would put it on her bedside table and read it every night.
See how small that was? It was a “little bit” of effort, a “little bit” of caring, and a “little bit” of compassion.
Are you ready to start sharing your little bit?
I want to hear your stories like this.
Oh I’m just sitting here patiently awaiting patience to arrive at my doorstep and ring the stinkin doorbell….. Any minute now…Waiting……..
Since patience doesn’t seem to want to stop by tonight, I thought I might sit around and hang out with worry, stress, and impatience a little while. Arghhh!!!
This week has been a tough one. I am normally chipper and happy-go-lucky, but I just have so many things going on around me I wish I could just reach up and grab a few things and pluck them out of rotation. I can’t delve into specifics at the moment but I am getting tired of unpleasant turn of events. I will be glad when life settles down to some degree.
There are times when you just want to be a little wreckless. Maybe just enjoy moaning, groaning, and dragging your knuckles a bit. I guess now is one of those times for me. I will listen to logic knocking on the back door, while I patiently wait for patience to arrive at the front door tonight. I wonder if I left the light on so they know I’m home?! hmm….. Off to check. See ya.
In the meantime I will cling to this passage:
37:7 Wait patiently for the Lord! 1
Wait confidently 2 for him!
Do not fret over the apparent success of a sinner, 3
a man who carries out wicked schemes!
37:8 Do not be angry and frustrated! 4
Do not fret! That only leads to trouble!
37:9 Wicked men will be wiped out,
but those who rely on the Lord are the ones who will possess the land.
I love you lord for what you do for me. I love you lord for what I am to you. I love you Lord, those days you carry me. I love you lord. some days without you I dont know where I would be.
When I think about all the times and things I did said. Went after what I wanted so relentlessly. Brings me down to nothing when I think about how selfish Ive been. How selfish Ive been.
So you changed me. Rearranged me. made me better today. I can love you and not love me for all that I was consumed. Lord I love you because you loved me. And you showed me how to be. The love you found and gave to me. My heart was so buried. Until you showed me your way. That I could give love away. And be so happy. Lord Ill be so happy. yeah, to give my love away. Its not in taking day by day. Its in the giving love away. you make me straight.
I just wanna give my love away. Jesus. Give my love away. I thank you lord in heaven today. That you would give me the love that I would love to give away.
Jesus Im gonna give it away.
This heart of stone it turned to gold. It was rediscovered and recovered by Jesus. Im gonna give it away. You made my heart to love. YOu made my heart to love people. Give love, be love, now I know it. Im gonna show it. Ive gonna give love, Im not gonna take it. Im gonna give love, oh yea. My reason for being is to love humanity. I know I can just love. I dont see so color, I dont see no dirt. I dont see nothing but your heart and soul and spirit. I love you for you. Jesus put it in me to love, So I will love. No judgement on you. No judgement from me. Because God himself doesnt judge until your days are done. he told me so, so who am I today, to tell you what your doing wrong. Im nothing. Im nothing. Im no one without you Jesus. I know my place – behind you.